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Previous days

LaBush and Cheney

by grouchobeer
10/10 90 pts / 9 Votes - 8 comments
1, 2, 3, 4, 5,
6, 7, uh, 9!
IRAN! IRAQ!
HALLIBURTON, INCORPORATED!
Big musical flourish!

We're gonna do it--
Give us any bribe
We'll take it
Give us any law
We'll break it

We're gonna let our greed
show thru
Screwin' 'em our way


Nothin's gonna turn us back now
From our mission in Iraq now
We're gonna make our friends
Get rich

My way or highway


There is no pooch
We can't screw
Ever heard the word
'Strategery'?

This time there's no
Stopping us
Screwing up our way


On your mark
Get set
And go now
Got a plan
But not the know-how
We're gonna make
An awful mess

And we'll do it
Our way
Yes, our way
Fuck all the states in blue
And we'll do it our way
Yes, our way
Make all our dreams
Come true
For us-- fuck you.

LaBush and Cheney was taped secretly.
Tonight's episode: TWO WARS TOO MANY
Woo! I love the smell
of shit in the morning.
It smells like-- victory.
[*LAUGHTER]
What are you getting
all spiffed up for?
I got a heavy war tonight.
[*LAUGHTER]

Osama again?
You sly dog.
[*LAUGHTER]
No, Saddam Hussein.
Man, you oughta see
the size a his WMD's.
[*LAUGHTER]

I thought Osama
was a steady thing.
[*LAUGHTER]
Only on Saturdays.
[*LAUGHTER]

Tonight IS Saturday.
[*LAUGHTER]
Uh oh. [*LAUGHTER]
Well there's only one
thing to do.

Tell the truth?
Yeah, right. [*LAUGHTER]
I'll call up Osama and tell
him I can't make it tonight
because I got swine flu.
[*LAUGHTER]

You can't cancel on Osama.
Isn't he the brother of your
Poppy's business partner?
[*LAUGHTER]
Oh yeah. [*LAUGHTER]
Well, I guess I'll have
to tell Saddam I can't
make it cause I have
the AIDS. [*LAUGHTER]

You can't cancel on Saddam!
Your Poppy tried to nail him
for years and never did!
Think how proud he'll be
when you do! [*LAUGHTER]
Yeah... Maybe he'll
love me now!
[*LAUGHTER]
But what'll I do?

Hey! I got it!
Play with it outside.
[*LAUGHTER]

Why not have BOTH wars?
Halliburton can cater the
whole affair! [*LAUGHTER]
Now, Dick, that would
be foolish and
irresponsible. I'd be
plunging this country
into a Vietnam-esque
quagmire, and saddling
our grandkids' grandkids
with a national debt that
can never be paid off.


BWAHAHAHAHA!
YOU HAD ME
GOIN' THERE!!!
JUST FOR A SEC!
[*LAUGHTER]
BWAHAHAHAHA!
LET THE GAMES
BEGIN! [*LAUGHTER]

Hey good-lookin'!
Where you been
hidin' yourself?
[*LAUGHTER]
That is for me to know
and you to find out.
[*LAUGHTER]

Will you excuse me for a minute?
?

Evenin', Saddamy!
[*LAUGHTER]
How 'bout them
WMD's? I'll show
you mine if you
show me yours.
[*LAUGHTER]

I've already seen yours.
Your Poppy dropped a
giant M-80 down my
poop chute, remember?
[*LAUGHTER]
Aw c'mon. Just a li'l peek.
I hear you're really well
hung. [*LAUGHTER]

I'm afraid your
intelligence
is faulty.
[*LAUGHTER]
Man, I wish I had a
nickel for every time
I heard that. [*LAUGHTER]

I am not, uh,
how you say,
hung.
[*LAUGHTER]
Well, it's early yet.
[*LAUGHTER]
Will you excuse me
for a sec?

Yes, I guess--
so. [*LAUGHTER]

Psst... Dubya!
How's it goin'?
It's workin' great!
[*LAUGHTER]
Ima go talk to Osama.
Gimme a few, then
interrupt us, 'kay?

There ya are.
How you been eludin'
me all these years?
Must take kidneys.
[*LAUGHTER]
Which reminds me.
I wanted to ask ya
about your dialysis.
[*LAUGHTER]
Why do you want to
know about that?

As part a my comprehensive
national health plan, I'm thinkin'
'bout sendin' all our dialytics
to a cave in Pakistan.
[*LAUGHTER]
Oh, Dubya... they're
playing our song!

The theme from
The Beverly Hillbillies!
[*LAUGHTER]
Would you like to dance?
[*LAUGHTER]
Would I? Would I?

Peg leg! Peg leg!
[*LAUGHTER]
Oh, wait, that's
Abu Al-Zarqawi.
[*LAUGHTER]
Mind if I cut in?
[*LAUGHTER]

Well... ok. I reckon.
(Where the hell have
you been?) [*LAUGHTER]
(I was at the open bar.)
[*LAUGHTER]

(There's a open bar?
Why didn't you say so?)
[*LAUGHTER]

Hey, there ya are.
Didn't you have gas?
[*LAUGHTER]

I was going to ask
you same thing.
[*LAUGHTER]
Nah. Them's just beer farts.
[*LAUGHTER]

I had gas, but I used
it to kill the Kurds.
[*LAUGHTER]
I'll give you the
empty containers.
You can collect the
two cents deposit on
each one from Rummy.
[*LAUGHTER]
Awesome. Meet me
round the corner in
a half an hour.
[*LAUGHTER]

My wife doeshn't
unnerstan me.
[*LAUGHTER]
Frankly, I'm having
some trouble myself.
[*LAUGHTER]

No, I mean she'sh a
Leshbian. [*LAUGHTER]
Where is she from? Beirut?
[*LAUGHTER]

No, I mean she
likesh girlsh.
[*LAUGHTER]
Ah, you have something
in common then!
[*LAUGHTER]

No, I'm a gay.
[*LAUGHTER]
Well, my left leg is Ramadan.
My right leg is Eid. Why don't
you come up and see me
between the holidays?
[*LAUGHTER]

Whoa whoa whoa!
Don't let the chaperones
catch you! I want to
see daylight between
you two crazy kids.
[*LAUGHTER]
I'm sorry, Dubya.

That's okay, Obama.
[*LAUGHTER]
It's Osama.
[*LAUGHTER]

Whoops. How could I ever
mix up the two of you?
One's a Muslim madman
plottin' to take over the
world, and the other is
from a fine old Saudi
family. [*LAUGHTER]
So, you like Dick, huh?
[*LAUGHTER]
I LOVE dick.
[*LAUGHTER]

Awesome.
[*LAUGHTER]
Wait here once.
?

I brought those canisters.
Awesome. GUARD!

Yes sir?
Take that man out
and shoot him.
[*LAUGHTER]

Sir, I don't think
they have firing
squads here. I
believe prisoners
are executed
on the gallows.
Well, hang him, and
then shoot him.
[*LAUGHTER]

WHAT IN THE WIDE WIDE
WORLD OF SPORTS IS
GOING ON HERE???
[*LAUGHTER]
Uh... nothin'?
[*LAUGHTER]

YOU'VE BEEN TWO-TIMING
ME WITH THAT SADDAM
HUSSEIN!!! [*LAUGHTER]
I was only with him
because he reminds
me of you. [*LAUGHTER]
That's why I'm with you
now. Because you remind
me of you. [*LAUGHTER]
Your beard, your stench,
your vermin...
everything about you
reminds me of you.
[*LAUGHTER]
'Cept you. [*LAUGHTER]
How do you account for
that? [*LAUGHTER]

SADDAM HUSSEIN IS
NOT A TRUE MUSLIM!!!
[*LAUGHTER]
I thought you two were BFF.
[*LAUGHTER]

NO!!! I BELIEVE IN SHARIA!!!
Well, so do I.
Share and
sharia like.
[*LAUGHTER]

YOU'LL REGRET THIS,
MISTER GEORGE
DUBYA BUSH!!!
[*LAUGHTER]
Mission Accomplished!
[*LAUGHTER]

Dick... Dick... Dick...
What a mess I've
made a things.
[*LAUGHTER]
You have no idea.
Osama's men just
bombed the
Golden Gate Bridge.
[*LAUGHTER]

Well, there's only one
thing left to do.
Offer your resignation and
commit ritual hari-kari?
[*LAUGHTER]

Leave the Chicago Cubs
outta this. [*LAUGHTER]
No, I get to declare
martial law! [*LAUGHTER]
FOUR MORE YEARS!!!
[*LAUGHTER]
Whoo-hoo! Makes me
wish I had that long
to live! [*LAUGHTER]

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comments
NoteNote :   
8. 11.05.08 at 11:18 |Lewean10/10
Lewean
good !
7. 11.05.08 at 08:34 |jacki10/10
jacki
Great Job, Grouchobeer!
6. 11.05.08 at 02:19 |pixel_artist10/10
pixel_artist
The best bit for me was the song at the start 10/10
5. 10.05.08 at 22:27 |spark1in2the3dark10/10
spark1in2the3dark
Don't forget to let everyone know that this is a sequel. For anyone who missed the original: http://en.gnomz.c...
4. 10.05.08 at 16:37 |Entropic_Catalyst10/10
Entropic_Catalyst
Flint youre a retard.

And you have the attetention span of a rodent



I liked the way its like a sitcom. 10/10
3. 10.05.08 at 01:48 |wwefan10/10
wwefan
......
2. 08.05.08 at 16:00 |insertnamehere10/10
insertnamehere
Too fucking long! But I liked the beginning
1. 08.05.08 at 14:40 |flint10/10
flint
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