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Comic of the day

Leave It To Jesus: " Well, A Son Is A Poor Substitute For A Lover."

by thecaptainofo
10/10 50 pts / 5 Votes - 3 comments
M-m-m-mother Mary? Is something wrong?

Don't take that tone with me young man! I have a bone to pick with you! Wham Bam Thank you ma'am behind Joseph's back is one thing, but a broken condom, mystery exit and not even a goodbye? HELLO?

B-but, mom? Surely you must mean Dad? I mean I know He's a little free-spirited and all, and I never really got to know Him very well but..

Don't you fucking get it you idiot? Through theological time-travelling, trinitarian kerygma and scriptural loopholes, YOU ARE YOUR FATHER!
HAHAHAHAHA!

[b]FUCK ME!
HAHAHAHAHAHAH!
I mean, I've heard of men with a huge Oedipus Complex but Jesus, Jesus! This fucking takes the cake!
HAHAHAHAH!
Oh, I am so dead!
To be continued!
comments
NoteNote :   
Strangely enough, historial scholars place j.C's birthday according to the movement of the stars (and hence the bright north star being related to the alignment of the planets Jupiter, Neptune and Uranus! Or something like that) somewhere in late January. And THAT was traditionally Christ's birthday.



It was only moved to the 25th of December in order to dsplace the Roman Celebration of Saturnalia, a winter solstice celebratory feast for the god of harvests, where pine trees symbolising eternal life and the exchange of gifts to celebrate humanity was conducted.



t'was only later when the Holy Roman Christian Empire decided to christianise their 'pagan' beliefs in an act of self-righteous triumphalism, + maintaining the original holidays but subverting their original purpose, meaning + symbolism.



Hail Saturn!
3. 15.01.06 at 23:44 |thecaptainofo10/10
thecaptainofo
Like all the other stories in the Bible, the conception and birth of Christ was stolen from various ancient Pagan myths. The God always impregnates the Goddess before leaving Earth, so that she can give birth to Him again on December 25th.

So to put it in strictly theological terms: Jesus is a motherfucker.
2. 15.01.06 at 03:03 |Entropic_Catalyst10/10
Entropic_Catalyst
Dyslexic Unitarian Universalists Untie! Christological implications? Discuss:
1. 14.01.06 at 19:37 |thecaptainofo10/10
thecaptainofo
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